Feeling Unloved? Remember God loves you to the nth power.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mbf4prAG5y1qdaq7jo1_500.jpgYou would wonder why nth power? You would always hear it in mathematics or related to that subject. It means an unspecified ordinal number, usually the greatest in a series of values or simply put to the utmost or extreme.
Isn’t amazing? Your Father in heaven loves you very much and He even commanded His angels concerning you to guide you in all your ways, they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone (Psalms 91:11-12). Get that? That’s how much God loves you that He’s not going to hurt you even a bit.
So when you feel being so unloved keep this in mind, God loves you with an everlasting love. If you feel that the world is against you, run to Him and cry out when things are not going easy, but always believe that He will always there for you.
Never lose faith and hope that everything will come to pass. Celebrate in His love for He alone can satisfy the needs of your heart. Take heart for all the troubles, it is there to strengthen you.
But I’m warning you, the enemy will try to make you remember of the things that hurt you, sadness will snatch you from God’s power. Tears will blur the sight of joy and harsh words will deafen you from the promising words of God. Lies will mute you from speaking the truth. Hurt will cause you to become idle and will dishonor God.
However, all you need to do is set aside the hurt of being unloved. Forgive the ones who hurt you, but never forget the lesson they teach you. Love until it hurts no more. The kind of love Jesus taught us to give.
And last but not the least, whenever you feel unloved, rejected and ignored. Remember to whom you are belong and you are love to the nth power!

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To The Person Who I Thought Was Really The One

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You are the man I loved since the moment I saw you and sadly until now even though you already walked away. I really thought you are the one for me, the one I could be with forever. But forever is impossible between us.

I know I have my faults too why you fall out of love. But I will try to explain myself. Behind all those shooing was a heart that wanted you to stay and annoy me still. Behind all those opposition I made every time you make an argument was really a heart that wanted to be with you and talk to you and argue about silly things.

Behind those tired eyes was a heart longing for you to give me rest on your shoulders and assure me that everything will fall into place. Behind those shrugged of annoyance was a heart that wanted to be understood.

But when the day you said that you don’t love me anymore I feel like my color has taken away from. Everything turned dull and blurry. It felt like a lost a sense of living. I lost the will to live. I cried all night trying to numb myself from the pain of your words. What am I supposed to do now? How about those promises we made together? Am I going to do it alone?

I cried in front of my Mom and was about to say how I lost you but I just said that my grade is about to fail (which is true because I was so distracted thinking how we are falling a part and studying is difficult at those times). Mom said that I should focus more and she said that I can do a lot better.

I tried to cheer myself up and did everything to make my life even busier so that I will not think about you. I read a lot of books and sleep and eat more. Showing everyone that I can be happy without you. And when you are being teased by the girl you love now I just smile and say I don’t care. But I care A LOT!

Sorry if I really got mad and say hurtful things to you. That was because I was corrupted by my pain and anger and my pride cannot fathom the fact that you will never be mine anymore. But you know what? Every time I saw you my heart wanted to burst and I wanted to scream because of the pain.

Whenever I hear your name with our common friends I feel like crying and misses you even more. I don’t know if you are able to read this but I bet you can’t because you don’t care anymore. I just wanted you to know that I love you always. I may seem busy with everything and my hands are full with activities at school but I never missed a single second to miss you.

It hurts me when they say you are like my underling, the one who is always tailing behind. No… I don’t want them to talk about you like that because you are the person I look up to. You are like my Vanilla Star.

But now you changed. You didn’t keep your promises. Do you want me to remind you of them?

-You said I will never be an old maid because you’re going to marry me.
-You said you you are willing to wait
-You said that you will never get tired of me even though I am so annoying to the maximum level
-Lastly, when I thought everything will feel apart you said to me that you will never ever be gone by my side

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But even though you changed I don’t know why I continue to love you. I am not asking you to come back. I already know that will never happen. I will just ask you to be back to the guy I once knew. The one who brought me closer to God. Who’s mouth is clean from profanity. The one who would make up with my craziness and joke that is out of this earth but it’s funny anyway (for me). The one who is sensitive enough of how others would feel if they are being bullied.

You never stand up for what is right anymore. You only stand up for those bad influenced friend of yours.

I hope if you ever read this you will realize I never change. The only one who changed was the one who gave up the love he started and memories that were thrown away. And my fault? I just watched you made all those changes and understand that some people really change and to let them see that you really love them you will love those changes. And I did.

I am starting to move on now not because I want to but I need to because you already did. Again I just wanted you to know that even you changed, I loved those changes and will love you until this pain in my heart will fade.

May God bless you! And I love you forever and always…

New Found Hope

jesuspainting

Meaningless.
Hopeless.
No purpose to live
That’s what I thought of my life.

Unwanted.
Rejected.
Loving alone
Forever alone…

Efforts were blown
Mistakes are known
Lost purpose to live
No joy to give

But everything change
I am changing
I thought of these troubles
Like a game so challenging

Almost a year of being
A daughter of a great King
Who gave me salvation And everlasting peace
Renewed my life again and gave me bliss

photo-credit: http://www.mwordsandthechristianwoman.com/

Took You For Granted

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I cannot really hate you.. I really can’t.
I thought my heart’s completely broken, but it’s just bent.
My love for you conquered every hate,
Even though you’re long gone now and I am too late.

As feelings of love coming back to my heart,
The love that keeps me together and somehow made me fall apart.
I was lost of finding and chasing after my dreams.
Never thought that it was like chasing after the winds.

I forgot about you tailing behind.
Lost myself in the process of becoming what I can’t find.
I care more about myself, ignoring what you feel.
I thought you’ll be always there, standing still.

I remembered all this things I’m longing are nothing,
Because I realized if I had you, I have everything.
I came back and stop pursuing,
And that time I’m losing you and your love is fading.

I was hurt so bad, I started to hate you,
Accused you things for leaving me blue.
But as soon as I realized that its all my doing,
When your love faded, I didn’t do anything.

I wrote this poem as a way of saying sorry;
I’ll be always praying to God to keep you happy.
But I was thinking if there’s still a chance,
If ever I could steal your heart again, in just one glance.